words to share

There are many things to be thankful for. I’m healthy. I have a home and a loving family. I have a job. I have great friends.

One of these friends is Kark. A fantastic photographer, man of a million ideas, and determined to beat cancer. He remains positive and only surrounds himself with others who share his positive mindset. He sent this email today…

I have been in the hospital more than 4 of the last 7 months now. This leaves a lot of time for serious thought and reflection. I am surrounded by people on the inside, fighting to live on the outside. I look out the window and see that we are surrounded by people on the outside that don't even realize they are alive. Life is funny. You don't realize how good times were until times get bad. You don't realize how much you miss someone until they are gone. You don't realize how good you felt until you get sick. You don't realize how alive you were until you are dying.

I found myself walking the halls as fast as I could turning anger and frustration into much needed exercise. I kept thinking about how I couldn't wait to get out of here and start living again. I thought about how much my life had changed in the last year and how much I had lost. I thought about those people on the outside that have all the health in the world but don't have the will to live their lives. It tortured me like Johnny Cash's lyrics to Fulton Blues: "but those people keep on moving, and that's what tortures me." I felt the anger and rage at my situation. I was almost running through the halls as I turned the corner and saw a sign on a patient’s door. It said: "PATIENT UNABLE TO SPEAK".

Then I remembered a week during the summer when I had finished a round of chemo and was barely able to speak and had to take shots of morphine just to pass soft food. I suddenly realized that my situation was a lot better than it could be and found myself to be very fortunate. As far as that patient behind that door with the sign was concerned.....I was on the outside.

" Be Content with what you have, rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you. " - Lao Tzu

See you on the outside,
Kark